Immune responses

Fools

On Friday night, I went to bed at a respectable hour as I had to attend a Pilates assessment the next day at 7AM.  It's a bad habit, but I usually check my Facebook feed at least once before going to bed, when someone I knew messaged me through Whatsapp, a mobile messaging program that I primarily use to stay in touch with friends.

This guy and I haven't seen each other in a while, and suffice it to say, we've certainly had our differences.  Yes, we physically intimate together which was pretty darn good, but we never could move get it past that point, despite indications that we were all systems go on the emotional side too.  (As it turns out, I was, but he wasn't).

Anyway, I usually ignore his messages or reply with an emoji, but tonight was different.  I didn't think I had anything to lose (I was wrong), so I asked him, "What went wrong with us?".

He replied and said it was his fault, and apologised.  This admission was the start of a lengthy conversation (which I will not detail here) which essentially ended in a mutually agreed resolution: that we would meet and catch up as friends, and see where that goes.

Over the weekend, we continued to chat -- friendly banter with subtle hints reasserting my interest in meeting up. I knew that he was busy with work so I didn't press for an immediate meet up.  But I thought at least he would try to at least have more time to talk once he got home.  Yesterday, I asked him if I could call him up that night.  "Just let me know when you're free," I said.

I guess he still isn't free because I've haven't heard a peep out of him since yesterday.

Giving the story away

I freely admit to being a romantic.  I see guys on the street, or on the tram, and I've already written several chapters in our sweeping love story stretching through several continents, where we get entangled in wild adventures and intrigues, but ultimately culminating in a quiet night's dinner of rice and curry in our little house on a hill.

Yes, it's that bad.

Which is why I had to give it up for a while.  I had a long stretch where I did away with being romantic or entertained romantic thoughts.  I even thought I forgot how to fall in love at one point.  I thought myself incapable of it.  Or to put it another way, immune to it.

But no one is immune to everything.  And no one is immune forever.  All it takes is a strain your system hasn't encountered before to weaken your defences and you're down for the count (again).  Which is probably why I thought it would be 'safe' to let this guy back into my life again.

"What went wrong with us?" I asked.  It looks like I got my answer.

Anyway, I'm gonna leave this [lyric] video right here.  At least Troye Sivan understands me.

This is Day 8.